Standardized Options by CBOE: the next evolution in trading available today!
"These shares just aren’t cutting it! My account value barely moves, at most a few measly percent a day. It’s been years and I’m barely keeping up with inflation!"
Now there’s another way. Hi, I’m u/Flying_Madman, here to offer you financial advice. Introducing standardized options by CBOE, your go-to source for derivatives trading instruments. For years options trading was limited to market makers and large institutions but now you too can swing with the big boys!
At the CBOE we believe that you, the retail trader, should be empowered to make irresponsible financial decisions and blow up your account just like the professionals. With their wide array of strikes, expiries, and underlying securities, there are options to fit any trader’s financial goals and personal risk tolerance.
Standardized options are highly leveraged derivative instruments that amplify your buying power to never before seen levels. Going all in on just three 0 DTE SPY calls a week have been mathematically proven to make you a millionaire in less than one year*.
What are you waiting for? Ask your financial advisor if standardized options trading is right for you today, then disregard their dumb advice and do it anyway!
\These statements have not been evaluated by the SEC. Standardized options are not intended to diagnose, treat, or cure any medically recognized illness. Trade standardized options at your own risk. CBOE and WSB are not liable for any losses incurred while trading standardized options. Side effects may include headaches, heart palpitations, dizziness, nausea, uncontrollable giddiness, insanity, and a desire to long ROPE. Consult your physician if you experience profits for three or more consecutive trading sessions while using standardized options as this may be a sign of a serious dissociative disorder. Don’t trade standardized options if you have a heart condition or are a risk adverse pansy. Having trouble affording trading fees? Your broker may be able to help.)
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May 15, 2021 at 01:17PM